teary worries

I woke up one fine morning and realized that I can no longer cry! Yes, I mean it’s not like I am so happy that I don’t want to cry, but it’s more of a loss as I really, desperately want to cry, but tears won’t come out, it seems they have taken a sabbatical. Not like they were overworked but yes I guess every single thing should get a few days off of their schedule. And here I was a stupid girl who thought that tears are an integral part of a person’s life, just like diamonds. We can’t do without both .And I think crying is a very important part of life. I truly despise people who say that crying is for weak people. I feel like shouting at them “you morons then why do you think god has made tears?” I think tears are the best stress buster or else the magnitude of pain that gets added on a daily basis in our lives would have gone up to monolithic proportions .I would say that crying is one of the best methods of intra-personal communication . And the best part is they silently get rid of our sorrows. So, here I am mourning the loss of my best companion, repenting the times when I was not very fond of my precious tears. But alas! now I am on my own ,fighting those painful and excruciating times lurking at every corner. So, please I want you back ………..touch me with your magic wand, heal me of the pain .Let my eyes bathe in your charm and let me live again.

For a special teacher...........

I have tried many a times to write about you,but whenever I start writing about you ,I don't know how to pen my thoughts because my thoughts are as abstract as my feelings for you.I knew you for just seven days and those seven days were the most important days of my life.The thing that I liked most about you was that you taught me to believe in myself.How you always said "Good seeds bear good fruits ".I still try to abide by that only because you wanted me to.So,this time I have tried to shed all my inhibitions and go on a journey down the memory lane with the hope that some day you will read this post.
Their are some moments in life when you desperately want to hold onto someone .I experienced it when I saw you for the last time at the metro station.We were to go seperate ways after that fateful evening.Your work had been over in Kolkata with very little help from me.I was a fresher naive and a novice(in your words),still you never ever showed any dissatisfaction.You always believed in me and most of all you made me believe in myself.You listened to me like every words I said were pearls of wisdom.You made me feel so important.You were the best teacher I ever had.You were the best friend I always longed to have and you were the lover I think I will never have. But yes I promise you that One day I will make you proud and be the one you always wanted me to be.

confessions of a confused mind

Well have you ever felt that sudden numbness in your tummy when someone asks you what do you want to do with your life,or that whether you have a proper plan for your future ? Especially if you are someone who's dreams and ambitions are as myriad as mine.I wanted to be a scientist when I was in 6th and remained faithful to that ambition of mine for three long years.me that I am about to be a graduate in a course of two months! My mind Then as I stepped into the threshold of youth the dream of being a scientist could not woo me for long.It's place was taken by more vibrant and glamorous choice as the likes of fashion designing.One thing that I really specialized in doing was day-dreaming.Soon ,I would have such ambitious day-dreams like putting up fashion shows in Paris and Milan.I had started getting a little too serious about this career option.I even appeared for the NIFT exam .Here I think mentioning the fact that drawing is as alien to me as rocket science will be useful for you guys,so anyway I did not get through the entrance exam and for a while took painting lessons but soon got bored of it.That is when Cupid struck and I fell in love with Advertising and got committed enough to do my graduation in Media Science and I am still head over heels in love with it.So now back to the basic question ,well recently I heard the same from none other than my no-nonsense dad.I replied by using such high-fi words as MBA,Marketing Management and started dreading the myriad form of cruel questions that were about to follow these seemingly promising and harmless names,well as expected he came back with all his vigor and asked me where do I see myself after 10 years..........I was lost in the world of Mercedes,Audis,BMWs,Pradas,Guccis and all sorts of miraculous names and then I realised that I had not answered him and his face by then had become the unfriendly shade of red.Now as you would have understood by now that I am certainly clueless of my future and would not be able to answer it even if it struck me between the eyes and friends has there ever been anyone other than Nostradamus who had this gift?How could I ,an ordinary girl in her early twenties dare to answer such an integral question ? So,anyway I should have known better,that was not the time to introspect,my dad was waiting for an answer.I closed my eyes and said ,"Dad I want to be a copywriter ".............................................There was a pause of a good five minutes and my heartbeat was completely in sync with the clock.May be it was the confidence with which I spoke or the fact that I did not fumble when spoke,he seemed less disappointed than before.That was a winning moment for me and that is when I realized my heart's true calling.And that is when I realized that finding one's path is very akin to finding true love........

Thought for the year...

"For every bad person in this world there is a good one .Only thing that matters is who do we remember".

the final countdown.....

I am in great pain and am really disturbed by the deafening noise of the graduation bells ringing in my ears 24*7.The bells have vowed to never leave my side just like that faithful doggy of Vodafone,only difference is that the latter is silent !Anyway the sound of the bells would have been pleasant if I had been a 9 pointer but I have always despised the notion of being the topper as I have heard that it gets really lonely at the top and I have always been the people person so being a 9 pointer would have secluded me from my friends so u can call it a sacrificial gesture. Now a days such selfless acts of greatness are not even acknowledged and I honestly don’t give a damn.I would love to be a martyr for the cause of unity.So coming back to the bells,the incessant ringing of the bells are appalling me at every second,they accompany me to the cinema hall,to the shopping malls,to the café joints ,soon I am going to be labeled as a deaf and dumb person all thanks to the tyrannous bells.I even went to a doctor and though he prescribed me some pills,he did not look very hopeful .I think he probably did not believe me. Anyway as they say that only the honest and the righteous have to face the music.So, if this is to test my will-power and my integrity then I pledge myself to the cause of safeguarding the cause of unity and I also appeal to my fellow friends : ‘Please don’t be overpowered by such selfish pursuits,it is only to make you weak.Always remember that by studying a little less we wont score over our friends,we can save them from the pitfalls of depression,we can make their life better.So please before opening your notebbok,please remember someone’s smile is at stake.’

my first story

The night was reigning with all its grandeur, the world was lost in profound slumber , it was half past two but sleep was miles away from Preetha’s eyes . She was lost in her memories. She lay wide awake in her room. Apart from the low humming of the refrigerator, the house was silent as if mourning with her.
She went to the terrace, the wind was blowing softly, embracing her in its gentle hands. The soft rustle of the leaves along with the voice of cuckoo created a soft serenade. The night brought back the memories. Tears started streaming down her cheeks at the thought of the blissful days she had had ;  the days that had ceased to exist all of a sudden. She could not believe her parents were not coming back to her. That they had gone to a world far away from hers. That they won’t love her, hug her, and scold her. The warmth had died. It was only a week ago they had gone to an official tour, leaving her with her grandparents. She could vividly remember the macabre day, when she was told that her parent’s car had collided with a bus, they died on the way to hospital. She now loathed herself for not being with them when they were taking their last breath. Her guardian angels were gone, living her all alone in this gloomy world. She looked up at the sky, it seemed to engulf her in its celestial enigma, and the sky was beckoning her. Suddenly she could see her parents smiling at her, longing to take her in their arms. Now she was standing on the railing, she could feel a strange vigor shaping in her, a sudden urge to unite with her parents. She was falling. The wind seemed to caress her, the world seemed so euphoric to her. Now she could see the ground. Her blood was gushing at such a fast pace, threatening to tear her veins. Then everything was a blur to her, her mother hugging her, her father laughing at the sight of her.
The chirping of the birds led the world to one more day full of dreams, commitments, targets as if reminding everyone of the monotony of life. But it was not monotonous for the residents of CE-244; an ambulance had shattered their otherwise peaceful existence that morning. In it lay the lifeless body of Preetha

A lesson well learnt

Lessons are the most integral part of growing-up and well the practical lessons are much more valuable to us than the theoretical knowledge.as it has been said that life is a learning process and we learn a novel thing every minute of our life. How can one forget the lesson to be learnt from falling from a cycle that one should never give up no matter what .But do we really remember these lessons or just forget them as only one time inspirational. Something very similar to this happened to me one fine evening .I was going back to my hostel from my aunt’s ,I took a bus though I normally prefer a metro ride, but it being a Sunday and the buses being less crowded I decided to have a change of palette .So I took the bus which was, owing to my bad luck fairly crowded. So,I somehow managed to balance my way through the crowd and stand properly .It was going to be a long ride and the thought of standing throughout it was giving me the creeps. Anyway, I tried thinking of good things like taking a hot shower and watching romantic movies, tucked in my bed after that unfortunate ride, luckily for me, the weather was very pleasant and nothing like the otherwise humid climate of Kolkata. So,the ride took its course and so did the people but still I could not get a seat and had to literally pray to god to make any of the sitting passengers to get down but in vain !So ,well as I was trying to assure myself that everything was going fine and how I was better of in that bus than sweating it in the metro. So that is when I realized that there is an empty seat right across the driver but no body seemed to be sitting on it ,there was a man standing right next to it with a great entourage of luggage but even he seemed to be ignoring it, and I was a good deal far from it and with the bus shaking its assets at even the slightest of cue .it was going to take me a lot more than my already drained legs and arms. We were a good 12 people standing uncomfortably, looking unabashedly at every sitting passenger but every one was blissfully ignoring the presence of that stranded place.Even I thought that maybe the seat was broken or maybe it was just visible to me !Just then the bust stopped at one juncture ,a lady got up and swiftly ran her eyes around and saw the unoccupied seat and deftly went and took the seat next to the driver’s. Mission accomplished. And we the lesser mortals took a great effort in hiding our disappointment, and maintained a straight face throughout the journey.I kept thinking about it till late that night.It was just another affair in my everyday life,but it reinforced that basic lesson "winners dont do different things,they just do it differently."